The Worst Movies of 2011

Yesterday, I posted my list of the best movies of 2011.

Now, it’s time for the worst. My list will be a little different than most critics. You won’t see an Adam Sandler movie on my list. Why? Because Adam Sandler makes and markets his movies as exactly what they are… Stupid, mindless entertainment. Show me the critic or movie-goer that walks out of “Jack & Jill” and says, “I’m so disappointed by the movie where Adam Sandler dresses in drag as his own sister” and I’ll show you someone who’s not paying attention. For critics, movies like “Jack & Jill” are low hanging fruit.

So, I’m targeting the movies that tried to be more and failed. You may disagree and if you do, I hope you’ll let me know.

Here’s my list, in no particular order.

“DRIVE” – I was really looking forward to this movie. I’m a big fan of Ryan Gosling and Albert Brooks and the trailer made it look like an exciting heist movie, with a similar tone to one of my favorite all-time movies “Heat.” So, what went wrong? It’s boring! Long stretches with no dialogue. Long stretches with shots lingering on Gosling’s face. Long stretches of over-the-top violence. What it amounts to is: One Long Stretch.

“WHAT’S YOUR NUMBER?” – The answer is zero, which is the amount of times you should see this Anna Faris bomb.

“FOOTLOOSE” – Seriously? What’s the point? The original was much better. A lot of critics loved it. I’m not one of them…

“MARTHA MARCY MAY MARLENE” – Everyone was buzzing about this movie after it hit the festival circuit and for good reason. Elizabeth Olsen (the sister of the Olsen twins) and John Hawkes are both great in the film. And to be honest, the movie had me for 99% of it’s running time. And then…the ending. I’ve never turned on a movie as quickly as I turned on “Martha Marcy May Marlene.” It’s like the movie just stopped. No pay-off. I actually called the publicist after the screening to make sure they didn’t forget to show us the end of the film. Unfortunately, they didn’t forget. That’s really how it ended.

“TOWER HEIST” – Eddie Murphy, Ben Stiller, Matthew Broderick, Casey Affleck, all actors I respect. The biggest problem I had with this movie is that there wasn’t enough Eddie Murphy. He was close to doing something great with his role. It was kind of a return to the Murphy of the 1980s. Unfortunately, the movie spiraled out of control quickly and went from bing mildly funny to completely ridiculous.

“J. EDGAR” – Clint Eastwood and Leonardo DiCaprio team up for one of the worst movies of the year. DiCaprio’s impression of Hoover was pathetic and the movie was boring. Before seeing the movie, I actually had it as a sure bet for my top 10, instead you’re reading about it on my Worst Of list…

“TRESPASS” – Holy crap was this a stinker. It was trying to be “Panic Room,” but it wasn’t. Nicole Kidman and Nicolas Cage are a long way away from their Oscar winning pasts…

“THE SITTER”/”THE CHANGE-UP” – I’m a big Jonah Hill fan. Fat or skinny, I think Jonah Hill is funny. Same goes for Jason Bateman and Ryan Reynolds (not the fat or skinny part, just that they’re funny). But their respective movies, “The Sitter” and “The Change-Up” were very disappointing. Here’s the key to a good comedy: It needs to be funny.

Which of these movies is the absolute worst of the year? All of them…


Reviews of New Year’s Eve, Young Adult and The Sitter


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